Joys and Sorrows

Where to start???? There is sooo much on my heart right now. I will start with happiness first. My friend, Ashley, and I got to break away for an extended weekend in the beautiful mountains of Huaraz, Peru. ABSOLUTELY STUNNING! I definitely recommend it! I felt like I was back in New Zealand with the snow-capped mountains. We found thermal baths, hiked the Lago 69 tour, met an adorable Belgian couple (and because of this, Belgium is now on my must-go list! I love international connections!), ate crepes, shopped, explored, and did everything BUT take care of 40 niños that were all demanding our attention at the same time! What a refreshing break!





















The hardest part was also my favorite part. The Lake 69 "tour" aka torture. That thing should have a warning label: NOT for the average bear!!!! I was worried about it especially after asking a few guys what they thought of it and they both had the same look, expression and words, "It was HARD!" Oh crap. Indeed, it was a breath-taking 3+ hour hike up (literally I could NOT breathe!!!) Altitude and I aren't the greatest of friends.) So many times during this trek, I wanted to stop and turn around because it was so hard and physically, I felt like my body just wasn't cooperating. The altitude and thin air made me feel dizzy, weak and nauseous at times. It seemed like such a daunting feat every time I looked up and saw how much more we had. I kept thinking of the word of the year from God- perseverance. Once I eventually made it up, the view from the top was beyond what I could have ever imagined. I realized it was all worth it.



















I have been comparing that experience there on the mountain with the experience here at the orphanage. Sometimes life is pure and utter chaos here. A simple yet very accurate statement about life here...it is HARD! It's easy to get caught up in the trying and difficult moments and question "Why?" Why all the pain? Why do these kids have to endure so much at such a young age? Why did you bring me here and subject me to such heart-breaking scenarios and scenes and insane situations that make my soul just ache? However, it is here above all times and places in my life that my heart has grown the most and where I feel the strongest in my faith. The Lord continues to reveal Himself and his goodness despite it all. Especially lately, the devil has tried to make our home his playground- between countless disagreements and hard feelings between people here, the director of the orphanage quitting, 2 fellow volunteers getting mugged and now even death.

We found out that one of our precious children that was just moved to a different orphanage better equipped for his physical needs just suffered a heart attack and died. I go between shock, disbelief, and devastation. Somehow, I can find some comfort in the day he died. That day, I had the song "You are Mine" on my heart all day. I learned it on guitar and played it all day, ESP the chorus. "Do not be afraid;I am with you. I have called you each by name. Come and follow me; I will bring you home. I love you and you are mine." It helps me to think I was singing that as he was going to his new beautiful home to be with His loving Father that will never abandon him like his earthly father did. I loved that kid to pieces. He brought me closer to God. I'm grateful to him for that and to God for His purpose in all things and circumstances. I will praise Him in this storm. Luis, until we meet again...